I Like My Own Kind of Play!

The children who've visited lately each have their own style of play,
and give themselves fully to it—yet most still, in the course of playing, need a fair amount of interaction and company.
This visitor was a child of the *independent play* kind.
Before she even began, she had a clear direction in mind; her eye was keen;
she knew what she wanted to play, what she wanted to do—the idea and its content already in her head,
simply waiting to be met.
As the grown-ups, we really only needed to be quietly present—no need for much of a presence at all 😂.

From the very start she was absorbed in developing what she wanted to play, needing no guiding (or interrupting).
To introduce her to a toy, or nudge her toward a different way of playing,
you had to work to find a gap in her attention,
then find a way to "naturally" squeeze yourself in for about three seconds 🙋.

She was also the first child to use the *whole* space to play.
With each visit, she grew more composed in making full use of the props and the place.
On the surface, you might think she was just pulling out a heap of toys at random—
scattering them about, playing on a whim with no content, swapping one for the next.
In truth, what a child shows *dynamically* through play
often takes continuous watching to have any chance of catching.
Without the chance to follow that motion closely,
you might not link the real content in her actions, and see only heaps of scattered toys.

Watching across several visits, I saw that this child was, in fact, playing with real *system*.
The theme of her play was to understand the properties of physics and of matter through *dynamic experiment*.
Rather than stacking blocks to make shapes, she preferred to try pushing with different force or angle,
to knock things with a ball, or to combine blocks freely into imagined props and step into role-play.
She made good use of the whole space, set the purpose of each area herself, arranged the pieces she liked—
like building her own little village out on an open field, each "point" with its own function:
— a lookout base you had to climb up and down
— a zone for quieter, static play
— a play area for dynamically testing toys
— and even a private treasure spot.
She'd move, endlessly, between these points, replaying the games she'd set up there,
like a very busy village chief on her rounds.
She knew how to string different toys and materials together, creating the play she'd envisioned,
realising the scenes of her imagined world.
She roamed the little world in her mind, contentedly trying, adventuring, discovering—and, most of all, *feeling* 😊.
Each time her play-experiment let her observe (learn) how matter answered back, she was delighted.
When play ended, she'd harvested a whole basketful of understanding
(I get it! I can do it! So it works this way! Look what I can do!), and seemed thoroughly content.

Real-world play creates true, five-sense experience for a child;
open-ended toys keep a child company as they imagine and create to their heart's content;
and role-play is the key game by which a young child internalises the world and learns their skills.
In the course of her play,
we watched how a child shows her inner abundance and wholeness 😊.
Play doesn't always have to be with others.
Play is a way we explore the world,
running free alongside our own imagination—
and a satisfying experience in itself.
Each time we see a child leave with a contented smile,
our own hearts feel full, too 😊
Thank you, child, for the radiant smile you gave us.
We look forward to meeting again 🌿

🌿 A little note on child development 🌿
"Solitary Play," or "Independent Play,"
describes a child absorbed and immersed in a world of their own.
It was first proposed by the American social psychologist Mildred Parten, in 1932,
in her theory of the stages of children's play.
By this classic theory, a child's play moves through different stages as their age and social ability mature.
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In solitary play, a child is often showing deep focus, resting in a comfortable state of flow.
Leaving them the space and the quiet, admiring quietly from the edge of the play area (aka on standby),
is the finest companionship of all 💞